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So I spent a couple days torturing myself once again about why it is that I keep Teddy alive when he has absolutely not improved in the biting department in the year that I've had him and has maybe even gotten a bit worse - I've just gotten better at avoiding his mouth. I really think there's something neurologically wrong with him or just plain bad breeding because he just cannot handle external stimuli, and will cry out like as if someone has smacked him really hard when he steps on an extension cord that's on the floor, or when he steps on a rock - let alone trying to pet his back or cut his hair.
The nurse at the Clinic today severely remonstrated me for not "immediately getting rid of the dog that did this". I was like "yeah, whatever - I'm not going to do that". It really comes down to as simple as the fact that for some reason I don't see dogs as inanimate objects that aren't really alive anyway - I see them as being the same as humans and I don't think that if they're healthy in every other way that I have the right to take their life. For some reason I think that the decision has to be up to Teddy, and some of the time he still seems to be enjoying himself.
We're all going to be dead for such a long time. And there's already so much death happening around us. But when I'm having a bad day with him - the lessons that he is trying to teach me seem to be very hard to learn.
So it's taken me a couple days to work through what happened on Tuesday night and become a happy dog owner again. We all have cranky people in our lives - it's just that most of them don't have dirty teeth that they feel compelled to sink into our flesh when they want to show their displeasure at something we're doing at certain moments of the day. I am still really hoping that he is going to understand that every motion I make is not intended to hurt him - but is meant to help. After a year he still hasn't clued in unfortunately.
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Ouch. I can understand some elements of what you are going through. My thoughts and just a rhetorical question for you... would you give the same rationale for a dog as large as say a dane/saint mix? Say a dog that is 180 pounds and built like a frieght train?
ReplyDeleteI know these are highly personal decisions and we have to weigh in with our own experiences and ability to 'deal'.
I hope you are doing better and heal up just fine. Best wishes!