Sunday, May 29, 2011

I have come to the conclusion that I am completely burnt out. Having 2 geriatric dogs who are on the edge of dying and watching them every day, as well as having a father with health problems who is teetering on the edge of a crevasse -
I tend to forget that I have bipolar disorder, diabetes, pernicious anemia, and chronic migraines - and I think that I can do whatever I want to do and that there`s going to be no repercussions to my health at all - but I think I am realizing that this is not true.

I can`t do whatever I want to do, take on as much as I want to do. I am not going to change the world.  It's going to look exactly the same whatever I glibly think I'm doing, so there's not much use killing myself trying to keep breed specific legislation out of Nova Scotia - I am not going to be the thing that keeps it out.  The world will continue to spin on it's axis without me, regardless.

I have had one too many people ask me the question "when are you due?" - which was yesterday (that is, ask me the question - not, when I was due). It's as hard to walk around looking like you're 8 months pregnant as it is to look at a person who looks like they're 8 months pregnant - when they're not - and it's becauseof their shitty health.

So I'm going to attempt to stop thinking so much about pit bulls, and start taking more pictures of pretty flower like these tulips I saw today on someone's stoop as I was passing by - and I've dug out the book "The Flat Belly Diet" - maybe I'll crack it open and have a look. Maybe.

But I'm definitely going to try and loosen up, and look away.

3 comments:

  1. Taking care of yourself first - I like it. We all need to do that every so often.

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  2. Joan, you have done more than you realize. Look how you helped me.

    It's time for you to take care of you.

    You can carry the world on your shoulders.

    I wish you good health and happiness.

    Sybil

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  3. hello my lovely! smoke some good weed. breath deep, love life, look into buttercup's eyes. be well, my friend. xo

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